The Dilemma that Isn't Really

First off, congratulations to all the A-Level peeps!

So it seems everyone did really well, which proves that CHS people still rake in all the A's!

I particularly recall Fui being very worried about her AS results, and here she ends up being one of the only four in her class who got all A's!

Ahh I fear to think what I would get if I did A-Levels?

* * * * *

Aackkk. About my not updating. For a minute there I forgot I even had a blog.




Okay, no. I was just too lazy to write anything.





Again, not really. I actually wrote 4 long posts, but ended up not publishing them.






What I mean to say is, I'd actually written 4 posts, half of which were What-Happened-Lately Posts, and the remaining half were Emotionally-Charged Posts.

The What-Happened-Lately posts were too diary-esque for my liking (and I didn't have photos to upload, which are obviously critical for posts of such kind, y'know, photo-comment-photo-comment- repeat till end of post).

The Emotionally-Charged posts would probably just get on your nerves, and seeing that of late my blog is for once relatively non-emo for a bit, I probably should leave well enough alone.

And hence, a postless week or two.


BUT! I will say that I am having anxiety attacks.


Suddenly, just when it is slightly beyond that Point where it is Too Late, I am douuubting my education decisions.

I mean, everyone I know is studying something respectful, like dentistry and psychology and pharmacy and business, at reputable universities like (insert name of Reputable University), and here I am, applying to schools close to no-one in Malaysia has heard of (or indeed, has any respect for) because half of them sound super primitive (or so my mom thinks), and when I am asked on applications what my intended major is, what do I choose? Undecided.

That's ambition for you.

Sigh.

So yes, my mom thinks schools like Mount Holyoke and Macalester sound so primitive and sakai-ish, she doubts their credibility.

Frankly though, given the choice between Mac and a big-name school with a big-ass campus and big class sizes, I'd pick Macalester any day. I just prefer a smaller community, smaller class sizes and actual out-of-class interaction with my professors, that's all.

But I have to say though, the one big-name school that really appealed to me was Princeton. But unfortunately it is an Ivy, it is ranked #2 toughest to get into by Princeton Review and hence immediately deemed an Unreachable for me.

I figured if I'm going to, err, "waste" my application on a university I have close to zilch chance of being accepted, I might as well waste it on an ultra-ly selective liberal arts college that is also ranked toughest to get into, and at least it would be the kind of school that I would very much love to attend.

From the beginning my mom has disagreed with my decision to apply to only liberal arts colleges, but then because I am defiant enough, and because I am better at arguing my point forward than my mother, and because I am just downright stubborn, I was allowed to stick to my own list of colleges.

Of course, liberal arts colleges are very attractive so that I actually really want to go there, but I feel like the very unambitious person.

The person who studies Undecided major at Primitive-Sounding College.

(Okay I hope no admissions officer sees this and strikes me off their list.)

Last year, when I only had a tentative list of colleges to apply to, my aunt asked me why I'm choosing to go to third-tier schools.

Third-tier WTF!

She thinks first tier means Ivy League schools plus MIT plus Stanford (though I think she thinks these two are Ivies, bless her);
second tier means better sounding schools, in other words schools that read as "University of XXX", or basically schools that sound proper, regardless of whether or not she has actually heard of them before;
and then there are third-tier schools, schools whose names bear words like "Mount", and in particular, one whose name sounds like a toothpaste brand ("Colgate").


Aiyaiyai. I suddenly have the urge to give psychiatry a good think over, but then that would mean doing medicine first.

I have no idea where I got the crazy idea after SPM that medicine would be for me.

ME? Medicine?!

It is like Captain Jack Sparrow dressing up as Spongebob Squarepants for Halloween. Just wrong, doesn't go together! Though I am in no way trying to associate myself with Cap. Jack's super-coolness. Nor am I implying Spongebob is uncool.


Just what am I ranting on about, eh?

Still. I know my mom is disappointed I didn't apply to a bigger school, and she is obviously very unhappy with my choice of major. (She says she still has about two years to change my mind.) (I say, go ahead and try.)

I can already imagine the next family reunion, if I may be so pretentious as to assume I'd be accepted into the following university -

Relatives: "Ah Kit just left for U.S? He study where ah?"
"Western Michigan University."
"Study what?"
"He say civil engineering wor."
"Oh not bad, not bad. CY also left hor?"
"Yeah."
"Where she study?"
"Colgate."
"What?! You bluff me ah! Where got such thing!"


My cousin is doing ADP by the way, and is guaranteed a place at WMU this fall.

But that is not the point.

Aiya. Actually. I sked l8er kenot find proper, respectable job. And den by then all my frens r doctors n dentists n business-people liao.

And me? My aunt (a different aunt, the one from my mom's side) says I can only find jobs at National Geographic, should I choose to pursue my major. She kept trying to get me interested in fields like psychology and, horror of horrors, actuarial science.
(Nothing wrong with the latter, just that it is so so SO not me!)

Thank you Family&Relatives, for being so damn supportive. Love y'all eh! (Sarcasm intended.)

Siiiiiiiiiiigh tell me I didn't make the wrong choice!

If worse comes to worst, I will just enrol in a local private university and do something like Mass Comm, maybe. Which will be a humongous let down, considering I'd been very excited over the very vast possible choices of study in U.S. colleges.

I dunno.

Okay byeeeee.

(Notice the time that I am writing this? Notice how I still haven't gotten my very messed up biological clock straightened out?)

Byee.