Attitude adjustment

" 当我和世界不一样那就让我不一样
逆风的方向更适合飞翔
我不怕千万人阻挡只怕自己投降 "

Haha, Ling sent me the lyrics to one of Mayday's songs through SMS, and now it's one of my favoutite (and often repeated) phrases.

Few days ago, someone asked me why I always do not 'give face' to people. Like when someone says something they think is funny but really isn't, I don't even try to fake a smile. Or during a really boring performance and people start waving their hands for God knows what reasons, they think I should wave along too, even if none of us really feel like it. Or when I'm not in the mood for talking, I just don't say anything, at all. Or what gives me the right to be so frank with my opinions.

Haha, here's what.

" 我如果对自己不行如果对自己说谎
即使你不原谅我也不能原谅 "

Now you know why you think I have an 'attitude'. Fish, I've had people whom I've never talked to before tell me I'm arrogant. Like, Fish, you want me to hunch my back, smile smile and pretend to be dumb just so I don't look like I have an attitude?

I am a very boring person. I admit that. If I don't know you well, and I've got nothing to say to you, I keep quiet. I answer your questions with answers as short and quick as possible, then I'd wish you'd just shut up. Call it an attitude if you want. I'd sometimes just rather be alone. Being alone doesn't bother me much. In fact, I'd rather be alone than have to make small talk and put on fak-ish smiles. It's awfully tiring.

I disable comments and that's an ATTITUDE? I was just kidding when I said I'm always correct, but I really am serious when I said I want my opinions untainted. Because comments really DO affect what you write, no matter how hard you try not to let it to. It's not an attitude!

I'm always frank, I know. But not THAT frank. I don't go ahead and embarrass you in front of everybody (unless you have done that to me before, haha!) I make it subtle, don't I? Though it's nice to know there are friends who appreciate mah frank-ness. You don't want to put on an uber hideous dress and have your friends tell you it's pretty then get humiliated later, do you?

And I have unrealistic dreams, but that's just what YOU think! My mom calls me idealistic and naive. One of my closest friend called it childish. Another had a skeptical look. What I have told you guys is only a fraction of what I've planned for the future. Wait 'til you hear everything, with all the intricate details!

" 我的手越骯脏眼神越是发光
最美的愿望一定最疯狂 "

Changing the world isn't hard to do. Haven't we already taken the first (extremely) small step?

And in case you don't already know, I love the way I am. I may screw up my exams every now and then, I am lazy and procrastinate 'til the very last minute, sometimes my life can be so so mundane, my room is in a perpetual mess, I can be obsessive compulsive with all the small things, I cannot sing OR dance for nuts, and I tend to bite off more than I can chew. But that's me, and I love it. And as cliched as it may sound, I'm going to say it anyway. ALWAYS be yourself, even when everyone else think you shouldn't. BUT, that only applies when what you do doesn't hurt anybody.

(In case you're wondering, the lyrics are from Mayday's "倔强". Probably the only Mayday song I've ever heard and liked.)