All that is cheap is good.

I am happy!

LOL Apparently, it doesn't take a lot to make me happy.


So. I managed to get 3 music albums, all for ohmygoodness-so-cheap-RM53.60!

Okay so one of them is a cassette (because that clunker of a car that I drive does not have a CD player), but still!

Best yet, I managed to snag Jack's Mannequin's "Everything In Transit" for a measly RM19.90!

*helpless silly grin*

Mainly because I never thought I could find it in local music stores. Oh man oh man.

LOL I think my sister and I spent more than an hour in that music shop, with me squealing excitedly (embarrassingly?), because it was like this little heaven, for some reason a lot of the stuff I liked was so cheap. Plus, they had a lot of stuff I couldn't find at the other CD shops I'd recently been to.

NOFX was also being sold at RM19.90. If CDs were people, you'd probably feel bad for them. I'm guessing their retail price is lowered because they are completely not in demand.
Like, "no one wants these, so I sell cheap".

Then in this corner was a sad-looking trolley that had scattered piles of cassettes.

Each cassette was sold at RM5, so I dug around a bit for something to listen to when I'm driving, and found awesome artists, like Chevelle (!!!) and Simon & Garfunkle.

Near the trolley were the usual priced cassettes of popular bands, all neatly arranged. All sold at RM20. Can you imagine? Chevelle, sold at a quarter of the price of a normal cassette!

So lesson learnt? When in music stores, always dig into those piles that look as though they're put aside only because no one wants them, and who knows what gems you might find!

Oh man oh man. There are few things that bring more happiness than having new music albums to listen to. Seriously.

It is completely different from and so much better than listening to the illegally downloaded versions of them.

And here I'll leave you with this - Backstreet Boys is performing here!!!!!!!!!!!

I think they're the only group I like that I can go watch them perform live and be totally fan-girlish!

It is very wrong to go to a rock show and go, "OHMYGOODNESS *guitarist* I looove you!!".
Or, "MARRY ME *lead singer*!!!"

It basically annoys the heck out of people.

But Backstreet Boys is different!

At a BSB show you are probably expected to be fan-girly!

Here, I membongkarkan a secret - I used to have a celebrity crush on AJ McLean. And I used to get upset when my brother purposely pointed to the BSB poster on my wall and call Brian Littrell "Shit Face".

See? I still remember all of their full names. A fan of 7 years, man!


It's very ironic. Their latest album is called "Unbreakable", but what is the design of their album cover? Lines that resemble broken glass.

Clever! (Not.)

Taylor Swift trumps Jay Chou!

Oh wow. Taylor Swift is crazy beautiful. And, she's crazy talented.

And she's only 18, what the heck!

You know, when it comes to music, I hardly venture beyond the typical rock/pop kind of thing. I have never, never really liked country music, but whoa, Taylor Swift is goooooood.

I was watching her stuff on YouTube, and frankly I wish I was half as talented as her, man.

Or sing half as well.

Or half as beauuutiful.

LOL in a weird stalker way, I watched all of her videos because she's too breathtakingly beautiful to not want to watch her.

She's down to earth, too. I mean, can you believe at the Grammy's red carpet, when a TV presenter came up to her to do a mini interview, she actually went, "Hi, I'm Taylor"? Pffft. Who doesn't know?

I feel like I'm halfway to being stalker.

* * * * *

Speaking of watching things, I just watched one of the worst movies I could ever possibly watch.

It was baaaaaaaad! It stars Jay Chou, it is called 'Kung Fu Dunk'.

I only watched it because me companions wanted to, and it is so crazy corny you wonder if they are going for the satirical corny, or the I-think-my-viewers-are-unintelligent corny.

During SAM last year, we were lounging about at the cafeteria and Esther said that Chinese movies are stupid because they try so hard to deliberately make things happen.

Like, if they wanted a sad story, they'd have someone die suddenly, only they will die of a completely illogical illness, but that's okay in a Chinese movie, I mean, as long as someone dies, and it's sad.


In 'Kung Fu Dunk', winning basketball matches seem to be everything for these people. I mean, the captain of Jay Chou's team is always drinking alcohol, always in that "take a swig from bottle, wipe mouth with back of hand, and stare menacingly at the camera" way. Very lame la.

And towards the second half of the show, this alcoholic's sister explains that it is because he once lost a basketball game to his arch rival (because his hands were trembling uncontrollably during the match), and he has become depressed ever since.

Where got people so stupid, please! Lose a sports match, become forever depressed, must consume alcohol every minute of the day?

It's also really lame that his hands tremble only during the most critical moments. Like when it's down to the last few seconds of the game. Then he decides to sit it out and let Jay Chou take the court, and suddenly his hands very normal again.

What the heck. It is even more stupid than Stephen Chou's 'CJ7'.

(I respect Jay Chou as a musician, do not flame me please!)

(And boy do we know Jay Chou's fans are a passionate bunch.)


It seems that lately a lot of movies have been disappointing.

Even 'Sweeney Todd', man. I had high expectations of that!

I'll probably have to go put on my 'Lord of the Rings' DVDs just to get a good movie to watch.


Lord of the Rings never disappoints.

When Success is equated with Excess

I was going through Switchfoot KL concert clips on YouTube.

Err actually just a few select ones with higher ratings and which looked promising.


I saw this video, which is one of SF playing American Dream.

They started off most songs with a short introduction, and this song was no exception, except that it was exceptionally meaningful.

Jon went:

Things passes (sic) by too quick. This is a song about how short life is. I got no problems with cars, new guitars, new houses. These are all fine things, but when life is reduced to our material gains and the things that we acquire with some cash, I feel like we've lost the soul of who we are as human beings. I want something bigger than anything you can sell me, I want something bigger than anything you can buy. I want something bigger than a rock show. This ain't my Malaysian Dream.

And then they go on to play American Dream.

I didn't really pay attention that night, for I think I was too busy trying to see what was happening beyond that blackish mop that is the behind of someone's head.

But here, they speak a lot of sense.

I'm almost done with reading Bill Bryson's book, "The Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid", and have gotten to the Public Years chapter in which Bryson laments how Americans went from absolutely happy, to utterly discontented in a very short period of time.

Back in the 50's (according to him), life was simple. Pleasures came in the simplest form.

And then suddenly, you had bigger cars and larger TV sets. You had more expensive, but not necessarily better, appliances. People started working harder, to earn more money, to buy labour-saving devices, so that they have more time to work harder.

We all know it doesn't make sense, all this living for money and what it might bring, but we don't know it.

I mean, we know it, but we don't really know it.

We all hate it when adults go, "You're too naive. You have to be realistic. You cannot just go where your 'passion' (and here they make it sound like it is a dirty word) leads you."

It is true, of course. You cannot live without Enough Money.

But there was a time when you could have very little money, and it wouldn't matter because everyone else had just about as little as you, and besides, there weren't a lot of things to buy anyway. Most importantly, of course, was that you could be poor and still be extremely happy.

Not at this day and age, though. You couldn't survive very happily if you didn't earn much. For one thing, cost of living doesn't seem to be going very low for the moment, and oh, let's not even start on hiking fuel prices!

(LOL I was at this dinner thing when this 18-year-old turned to this 40plus-year-old and went, "So. Fuel prices up again, huh?" I just found it hilarious. Your parents still pay for when you "add gas" to your car lah, for goodness sake!)

Still.

Wouldn't we all be willing to give up our iPods, humongous HighDef LCD screens, Lexuses (Lexi?), big-ass mansions, haute couture fashion dresses, just so we can go back to the old days, when we didn't need any of these, didn't need them to impress or compete with anyone.

I recall that time when a friend of mine had to choose between a high paying career, and what she thought was a "high investment, low returns" career, and ended up choosing the latter, which she felt is where her passion lies.

That, I must say, is living for yourself.

For yourself, not for money, nor for the prestige.

I really want to quote her, so I really hope she doesn't mind my copying-and-pasting!

-----
it's quite stupid of me... for forgetting things i really want, things i really aim for

and needing something like this to remind me what i really want in my life

i am actually very ashamed of myself for even thinking of giving up to reality

face it. and yeah. money is all sort of thing

i keep reminding myself of what i really want

it seems that my motives are not pure anymore. it has changed. what do i want now? to leave malaysia and work elsewhere? or to be someone who can provide help to the others?
-----

I asked her what were her motives of doing what she chose to do, and she had the most beautiful answer.

-----
the heartfelt joy when the patients look into my eyes and smile, saying 'thank you'

and kids smiling like an angel to me
-----

When she said her "motives were not pure anymore", I think this is what happens to a lot of people. They choose to venture into a field for all the wrong reasons.

Because it pays better.

Because a "Dr." will precede my name.

Because I will be respected.

Because it is more prestigious, because my parents want me to, because I want to be a millionaire.

You could try and think, if your job really didn't pay as much, if it is a job nobody has heard of, would it still be your choice?

Or would you switch?

In my friend's case, I know she would choose to stay, 'cause she's doing it for the right reasons. For herself, and for the people she serves.

I think we're all very sien of all this mind-drilling that Money Is Everything, Money Gets You Everything, Go Forth and Make As Much Money As Possible, Go Fcuk Yourself If You Don't Have Money.


Money is good, we get it. Now can we revert back to a time when money didn't matter?

Of course, you could say the only reason I wish people with pimped out wheels and Chanel bags didn't immediately garner all attention and respect, the same reason I am ranting on right now, is that I don't have pimped out wheels and Chanel bags.

True also.

But even more so because I don't want to live, decades from now, in a society that basically reveres anyone who wears the most expensive clothes and owns the most expensive gadgets. I don't want to feel like I have to buy things to impress people just so they would respect me.

Have you seen the recent Grammy show? The Screen Actors Guild awards?

Have you seen how people on the red carpet have to flaunt their fashion pieces?

"Oh I'm wearing (insert mega fashion house), and this piece of jewellery? It's from (impressive-sounding designer)."

And people will 'oooh' and 'aaaah'.

It is the one thing every female celebrity on the red carpet gets asked - "Who are you wearing?"

And then after the awards, TV presenters will start discussing who's wearing what, who looks good, who should just go hide in the dressing room.

You almost want to go, "DAMMIT! Who cares if the cutting of her dress make her butt look fat?! WHo cares if black is so last-season?! She won a freaking Grammy for goodness sake!"

(Then again, you don't need the Grammy's to tell you you're a good musician.)

No no no.

This is definitely not where we should be heading.

Wouldn't it be cool, if people started pursuing their dreams, however absurd and impractical and idealistic they may be, and not worry that they are not making "enough" money?
(Definition of "enough" is open for debate.)

Wouldn't it be really cool, if people started living their lives for a much nobler purpose than to earn more money, buy more things?

I would hate to know that I am only doing a job because it enables me to get a Louis Vuitton bag every month.

To quote Switchfoot in their song "Gone",

Gone, like Frank Sinatra, like Elvis and his mom,
Like Al Pacino's cash, nothing lasts in this life.


Life is more than hundred dollar bills and roto-tom fills.
Life is more than fame and rock and roll and thrills,
All the riches of the kings end up in wills.

"All the riches of the kings end up in wills."

All this chasing for bigger pay checks, and when we die? Our money does not go wherever we go, fo' sho. Meaningless then, our working our asses off for more of those value-assigned pieces of paper (errr, money in other words).

If you think about it, if we work solely for the pay checks so that we have more money to buy luxurious things, if we lead such self-indulgent, decadent lives, then if someone asked us what the purpose of our life is, how do we answer them?

"I spend all my life trying to acquire more Things."

Don't we feel like life is so much more than all that? We want to live Explosively Big (and Meaningful), not live Expensive and Prodigal.

I'm sorry I rant so much.

I think it's from not having electrons and sulphuric acid and cell nuclei and hypothesis testing to eat up my time.

I don't mean to sound preachy and holier-than-thou though, it just ended up this bunch of crap.

Thank you for reading, by the way. (Eh if you really read until here can you type something like "I read until there!" in my chatbox or something. I'm awfully curious how many people actually read through long, photo-less posts.)

And please, spare me the "I am SURE you also love money CY! Don't tell me you HATE MONEY?!?!?!?!" lecture.

Of course I like money. But I hate how having money means being successful, I hate it even more that having money means having power.

(I've got 2 aunts, one older than the other (err duh?). The older aunt subtly gets pushed around because she is "poor", the younger aunt gets more respect solely because she has more money. See how wrong that is?)

So what if I choose a career that is inherently low-paying? Does that mean I will always have a little less power and respect than everyone else?

Take us back to a time when having money mattered a lot less, please. And we shall live Happily Ever After, because we will then be able to.

Toodles!

(And here I leave with a new-found conviction that I SHALL NOT BE BLINDED BY THE DOLLAR SIGNS Aaaaaarrrrrrrgggggghhhh! *Hero stance* *Thumps chest*)


Okay bye bye now!

Sorry I stared!

Contented!

I pretty much feel very, very lucky. Very fortunate.


BUT. Just the other day, I was doing grocery shopping with my family. I'm like the official trolley pusher or something, because that's what I pretty much do - push trolleys. That, and also point out an assortment of junk food I would very much like to buy that my mom wouldn't let me get anyhow.

So I was waiting for my parents to select a bit of pork at the non-halal section, and chanced upon this huge three-tiered trolley. It had all the squashed boxes and dented tin cans of food stuff, and bottles of sauces so old the labels had begun to fade. I presumed those were the Unwanted foodstuff, way past their expiry date and forced to retire to the Trolley of the Worthless and Forsaken, awaiting their impending destruction.

So imagine my surprise (and truth be told, horror) when this middle-aged lady came up to the Trolley, examined a few select packages, and *shocked faced* puts them in her trolley!

She didn't have a lot of stuff in her trolley, so she wheeled it off to the "Below 10 items" lane to pay for her things.

I was still looking at her (the counters weren't far away) when this Bangladeshi came up to the Trolley and scrutinized several very badly dented cans, probably looking for the ones that were least dented.

He made his choice, took a couple of cans and a bag of Dunno-What that was leaking from one corner of the bag, and went off to pay for them.

Curiosity piqued enough, I went to the Trolley and noticed newer price stickers covering the original ones, the latter presumably bearing much higher numbers.

So so so. These pathetic looking foodstuff are sold at a lower price, but then again not too much lower. I mean, a small-ish box of cereal (obviously squashed and all) costed RM4.50. That's not cheap, so you'd wonder how desperate people have to be to be willing to buy something like that just to save a few Ringgit.

Number 1, I thought those were the stuff they put aside so they could throw away later.

Then the lady went and got a few things off the trolley, and I thought they were giving them out for free, which wasn't too bad.

Then, I realized people actually pay for these really really sad looking foodstuff.

I was feeling quite horrible then, I mean, I didn't know. I thought everyone could afford food.

Obviously I knew not everyone can afford to buy premium quality foodstuff, obviously I knew some people don't have much food to live on.

I knew in a theoretical sort of way, but I've never seen people actually want and would pay for a very badly squashed tin of food.

I'd expect everyone who could buy food at the grocery store can afford to, and thus obviously would choose to, buy food in mint condition. Fresh, clean, not yet expired.

It was still Chinese New Year then, of course, so it feels even more weird to know that we are packing our trolley with perhaps a little too much food.

I am also very sorry, for I think I stared at them a little too much.

I was surprised, so I stared.

I really must get out more often (out of my sad little bubble where things are dandy, not my house).

Anywaaay.

From the image-thing above, you may conclude that I am an extraly, ultraly, extremely, very amazing sketch artist, well worthy of my own exhibit.

Until, of course, you see my sad attempts at drawing a teddy bear.



Which explains the picture I had to retrieve from Google Images.

Happy Chinese New Year y'all!

Left wanting

Oh man oh man! I was so inappropriate and inadequate! Literally!

I mean, so literally inadequate, you couldn't imagine what happened unless I told you (err privately of course!). But if you are smart enough you can pretty much catch on when I say I was literally inadequaaaaaaate!

Not enough. Incomplete. Lacking something.

Sometimes, I am just so Wrong the minute I step out of my house.

Aaaanyhow.


I almost scraped the side of a (stationary) RapidKL bus today.

Well, that's about it actually.

Oh I read that the people standing at the front (first few rows) during the Switchfoot concert had been waiting since 2 p.m.

Crazy, I wasn't even standing too far back, I was only blocked my annoying hands and cameras, and I'd arrived close to 7 p.m.

Yeah, that's about it.

I can't wait for Chinese New Year, man!

And the long drive back to HomeTown will be made so much more bearable with the downloading of a new audiobook, and brand new headphones! Not the cheap flimsy kind, mind!

Okaythanksbye.

Adding to the nooooise!

So here's my theory.

If you have been listening to a band for a gazillion years, and have never seen them live, when they finally do come, you obviously get super-excited, BUT! it just isn't the same.

Catching a band live when you've just bought their latest album no more than a year ago is damn exciting.

Catching a band live when you have listened to their old songs years ago, but have not listened to their latest album much, is not as exciting.

So, catching Switchfoot live was very anti-climatic. Not that they were any bad though, 'cause they pretty awesome.

Jon, with his somewhat effeminate gestures and long hair all over his face and his staggering around the stage, looked like a drunkard. A drunkard that rocks out on the guitar and preaches.

Yeashhh, I have never been to a concert where the band's front man actually preaches (morals, not gospel). But you cannot expect anything different from a band like Switchfoot.

Anwyay. I think I kind of over-listened to their songs since form 3, to the point where the songs are killed a little. (Much like how songs that are overplayed on the radio start losing their appeal.)

I mean, I remember coming home from school and putting them on repeat while I play volleyball against myself (err, the wall). I particularly remember "Learning To Breathe" being repeated a little too often. And then they play it during the show and it somehow falls flat. So the moral is, music players' repeat mode kills songs. Like, really.

And here comes the part where I complain about inconsiderate people at concerts.

There isn't a single live show I've been to that doesn't have signs prohibiting the usage of recording devices.

But. There isn't a single live show I've been to that doesn't have people trying to record the entire show.

It is completely fine if you want you whip out your camera for a few snapshots (even though it clearly isn't allowed), but it is not fine when you have your camera up, video-recording the entire damn show!

It is annoying as heck! I didn't pay more than RM300 (in the case of the MCR show) to stand close to the stage, only to have my view blocked by your hand and camera!

Everyone would be jumping to the music, and there your hand will be the entire time, blocking, obstructing, basically being a nuisance and annoying the heck out of people beside and behind you.

And there wouldn't be just one of such people. There would always be quite a number, which basically means if you are unfortunate enough, all you see are hands and cameras.

So there will be times when I just give up and resort to looking at the band from the view screen of cameras.

I don't get it though. Doesn't it ruin their whole concert experience, to have their arms raised the whole time, and not being able to move/jump just to keep their cameras steady? There was this Malay girl whose right hand got tired I guess, so she was supporting it with her left hand. Tsk.

And again, all this while large signs were pasted outside "strictly" prohibiting recording the show. Sure, if strict means turning a blind eye. You'd wonder what the security were looking for when they go through their bags before letting them in, because they sure didn't confiscate recording devices like they threatened to on the signs.

Tee-pee-cal Malaysians. Tsk.

Anyway, I feel obliged to leave you with something from my favourite Switchfoot song.

Where's your treasure, where's your hope
if you get the world and lose your soul?

Where indeed.

I recall reading something like this from the Bible. But it doesn't matter, it serves as a pretty good reminder to everyone.

You know, for a band whose songs contain words such as "decadence" and "entropy", and so often sings about moral degeneration, Switchfoot is a pretty upbeat band, the kind of band that serves you wake-up calls and make you re-evaluate yourself and what you stand for.

Niiiiiiice.

(They didn't perform this post's namesake though. I was so hoping they would.)

* * * * *

Interview tomorrow. Weirdly, at an Indian mamak.

Ciao!

The Dilemma that Isn't Really

First off, congratulations to all the A-Level peeps!

So it seems everyone did really well, which proves that CHS people still rake in all the A's!

I particularly recall Fui being very worried about her AS results, and here she ends up being one of the only four in her class who got all A's!

Ahh I fear to think what I would get if I did A-Levels?

* * * * *

Aackkk. About my not updating. For a minute there I forgot I even had a blog.




Okay, no. I was just too lazy to write anything.





Again, not really. I actually wrote 4 long posts, but ended up not publishing them.






What I mean to say is, I'd actually written 4 posts, half of which were What-Happened-Lately Posts, and the remaining half were Emotionally-Charged Posts.

The What-Happened-Lately posts were too diary-esque for my liking (and I didn't have photos to upload, which are obviously critical for posts of such kind, y'know, photo-comment-photo-comment- repeat till end of post).

The Emotionally-Charged posts would probably just get on your nerves, and seeing that of late my blog is for once relatively non-emo for a bit, I probably should leave well enough alone.

And hence, a postless week or two.


BUT! I will say that I am having anxiety attacks.


Suddenly, just when it is slightly beyond that Point where it is Too Late, I am douuubting my education decisions.

I mean, everyone I know is studying something respectful, like dentistry and psychology and pharmacy and business, at reputable universities like (insert name of Reputable University), and here I am, applying to schools close to no-one in Malaysia has heard of (or indeed, has any respect for) because half of them sound super primitive (or so my mom thinks), and when I am asked on applications what my intended major is, what do I choose? Undecided.

That's ambition for you.

Sigh.

So yes, my mom thinks schools like Mount Holyoke and Macalester sound so primitive and sakai-ish, she doubts their credibility.

Frankly though, given the choice between Mac and a big-name school with a big-ass campus and big class sizes, I'd pick Macalester any day. I just prefer a smaller community, smaller class sizes and actual out-of-class interaction with my professors, that's all.

But I have to say though, the one big-name school that really appealed to me was Princeton. But unfortunately it is an Ivy, it is ranked #2 toughest to get into by Princeton Review and hence immediately deemed an Unreachable for me.

I figured if I'm going to, err, "waste" my application on a university I have close to zilch chance of being accepted, I might as well waste it on an ultra-ly selective liberal arts college that is also ranked toughest to get into, and at least it would be the kind of school that I would very much love to attend.

From the beginning my mom has disagreed with my decision to apply to only liberal arts colleges, but then because I am defiant enough, and because I am better at arguing my point forward than my mother, and because I am just downright stubborn, I was allowed to stick to my own list of colleges.

Of course, liberal arts colleges are very attractive so that I actually really want to go there, but I feel like the very unambitious person.

The person who studies Undecided major at Primitive-Sounding College.

(Okay I hope no admissions officer sees this and strikes me off their list.)

Last year, when I only had a tentative list of colleges to apply to, my aunt asked me why I'm choosing to go to third-tier schools.

Third-tier WTF!

She thinks first tier means Ivy League schools plus MIT plus Stanford (though I think she thinks these two are Ivies, bless her);
second tier means better sounding schools, in other words schools that read as "University of XXX", or basically schools that sound proper, regardless of whether or not she has actually heard of them before;
and then there are third-tier schools, schools whose names bear words like "Mount", and in particular, one whose name sounds like a toothpaste brand ("Colgate").


Aiyaiyai. I suddenly have the urge to give psychiatry a good think over, but then that would mean doing medicine first.

I have no idea where I got the crazy idea after SPM that medicine would be for me.

ME? Medicine?!

It is like Captain Jack Sparrow dressing up as Spongebob Squarepants for Halloween. Just wrong, doesn't go together! Though I am in no way trying to associate myself with Cap. Jack's super-coolness. Nor am I implying Spongebob is uncool.


Just what am I ranting on about, eh?

Still. I know my mom is disappointed I didn't apply to a bigger school, and she is obviously very unhappy with my choice of major. (She says she still has about two years to change my mind.) (I say, go ahead and try.)

I can already imagine the next family reunion, if I may be so pretentious as to assume I'd be accepted into the following university -

Relatives: "Ah Kit just left for U.S? He study where ah?"
"Western Michigan University."
"Study what?"
"He say civil engineering wor."
"Oh not bad, not bad. CY also left hor?"
"Yeah."
"Where she study?"
"Colgate."
"What?! You bluff me ah! Where got such thing!"


My cousin is doing ADP by the way, and is guaranteed a place at WMU this fall.

But that is not the point.

Aiya. Actually. I sked l8er kenot find proper, respectable job. And den by then all my frens r doctors n dentists n business-people liao.

And me? My aunt (a different aunt, the one from my mom's side) says I can only find jobs at National Geographic, should I choose to pursue my major. She kept trying to get me interested in fields like psychology and, horror of horrors, actuarial science.
(Nothing wrong with the latter, just that it is so so SO not me!)

Thank you Family&Relatives, for being so damn supportive. Love y'all eh! (Sarcasm intended.)

Siiiiiiiiiiigh tell me I didn't make the wrong choice!

If worse comes to worst, I will just enrol in a local private university and do something like Mass Comm, maybe. Which will be a humongous let down, considering I'd been very excited over the very vast possible choices of study in U.S. colleges.

I dunno.

Okay byeeeee.

(Notice the time that I am writing this? Notice how I still haven't gotten my very messed up biological clock straightened out?)

Byee.